Coffee Share 181222

This is a Weekly Coffee Share hosted by: Eclectic Alli.

Alli manages a weekly list of posts from any who want to just stay in touch, chat about blogging, writing, travel, photography, children, pets, work, life hacks or just about anything else that might be of interest.  Thank you Alli!  We appreciate you doing this for us.

Here’s the link for last week.

Here’s the link for this week.


Hello – hello. I’m pleased that you stopped by. The Christmas shopping wave is passed and work has sent us all home for a long week off. It would be nice if the whole time away were paid holiday, but that’s not the way my company does things – oh well. There are other benefits.

While surgically making my very way through the local mall today I was reminded of a funny story that happened to me way back before we had kids. My still-new wife was still finishing her graduate work and I was starting a new job that would prove to be quite a career enhancement and pivot point as a technical instructor. That’s the good side.

The not-so-good side is that I may have over-sold my abilities to do this job – teaching a certain topic; so I was really – really motivated and determined to succeed. To make sure I didn’t disappoint my new manager, I was putting in something close to 60 hours per week and was, this one Christmas weekend, both desperately tired from work and stressed over not having found the perfect gift for my bride.

I had a few jewelry ideas, but was not finding something that both fit my perfect idea and my very much less than perfect budget.

mannequin 5I had just run into yet another store that had some promise of having what I was looking for, but as I slowed my pace of dashing from store to store, I noted that a female mannequin in the isle before me had a bracelet that looked compatible with my gift idea. I didn’t really want a bracelet, but perhaps I could make it work if I was unable to find what I was looking for.

I went over to examine the bracelet more closely and was disappointed to see that it was not all close to what I was looking for and therefore wouldn’t work.  Dang!  I really hoped that it would at least be a decent option.  I was really getting tired of not making progress on this gift idea and I really needed both rest and to solve this tonight before going home.

The mannequin was standing on a short square box that put its hand right at chest level so I could easily see that the bracelet was loose on its wrist.  I really didn’t want to begin resume my race through the store looking for the women’s accessory department so I reached out with my finger to flick the bracelet around the mannequin’s wrist.

mannequin 3

It didn’t spin as much as I would have expected from a plastic arm but the capricious act gave me enough time to notice the detail of this mannequin.  I recalled hearing something on one of those business news radio shows about the current fad in mannequins was to make them as life-like as possible, so in this case, it meant that there were no exposed joints, like at the wrists.  Wow, I thought, there are no wrist gaps on this mannequin.

Okay, all of the following happened in a few seconds.  First  I noticed the incredible workmanship and glanced at the hand and finger nails.  Wow – they had to have molded this thing from a real woman, I thought, because it was too perfect. Even the skin looked multidimensional and not poured-plastic uniform and shiny.  How did they do that;  maybe a technique similar to what they do with wax museum replicas.

Second, I  glanced up the arm and, yes, someone had even very believably added tiny arm hairs – amazing! This thing had to have cost a fortune.

mannequin 4 I wanted to see how good this work of art really was so, third, I lifted my eyes to examine the face.  I immediately chose to ignore the head hair because that I knew it would just be a wig. The lips and nose might be easy to make believable, but the eyes should be harder, but then again,  I’d seen some amazing animal taxidermy but would that expense be used in the creation of a single mannequin?

Fourth, I bet myself that I could find a flaw. This was getting fun.

The lips, nose, chin and cheeks easily passed scrutiny so on to the eyes and wow, they —  YIKES – just winked at me. . . !  THIS IS A REAL WOMAN. . . !

mannequin 6 winkMaybe you saw it coming, but I (in my exhausted condition) didn’t and was so shocked that I almost fell backwards into a rack of name-brand purses and wallets.  It was all I could do to not openly give away that I was at the edge of fight or flight mode.  With great difficultly and trying to maintain some scrap of self-respect, I gathered what I could find of my composure and quickly and carefully walked away.

makeup supplies

I don’t think my heart rate settled down until I was well through the dreaded make-up department and I found a place to stop and think-through how big of a fool I had made of myself.  Seriously? A real human mannequin?  Is that really a job these days?

Well, other than the fully operational and, presumably fully anatomically correct mannequin, that store was a complete bust regarding the gift I was looking for and I found it later at another store.

But, I’ll confess that, while I did walk back to the heart-stopping, non-mannequin gal who remained at her post and pose, not being noticed by anyone.  This time I stood behind her and contemplated my potential options.  I thought, how fair it would be if I were to stand close behind her, catch someone’s eyes as they walked towards her and silently mouth to them, “Watch this,” and quickly poke my fingers into her waist to get a rise out of her – but I was too chicken to actually do it.  This woman had crushed me once already today and thought it best not see what other tricks she might know.

Merry Christmas all.  Love on your family and friends.  Breath deeply and give yourself some degree of quiet time.  You know we have a big year ahead of us.  Let’s finish our coffee and 2018 in comfortable fellowship.

You, at least, can rest in the knowledge that there is not some, much older woman still telling the story of how she was such a good mannequin that she scared the wits out of some guy one Christmas so long ago.

Thanks for stopping by.  Blessings all.

To select another story, please visit the full index by clicking here.

Gary photo n bio

 

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7 thoughts on “Coffee Share 181222”

  1. Human mannequin? Kind of creepy… When I was a college student, my brother once was a manager of a Halloween shop in the mall. The shop was a kiosk in Sears. I dressed up and stood outside of Sears with a handful of fliers for the shop. I stood perfectly still and would hand them to people if they got too close. Most screamed 😉 Fine for Halloween, but at Christmas? Odd…

    Liked by 1 person

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